Today has been a good day. I woke from a proper nights sleep. I have so few of those, and I actually felt good. I didn't even wear my cpap mask because I went straight off to sleep. Anyway, I was up and awake before 8am which on a non work day is almost unheard of. I opened the living room blinds to see a bird fly in front of me onto the trunk of a tree across the road. Camera to hand I took a few shots of a beautiful Green Woodpecker doing a traditional woodpecker pose. Quite pleased with myself with that, I waited for the engineers to turn up to replace my gas and electric meters. I wont bother you with the details of that but I now have two nice non card/key payment type ones. No more running to the non local shop to get topped up. I could see it was going to be a nice day, the sun shining and a real blue sky. I decided that today was the day I would go for a walk. That was a about 10:30. At 15:30 I managed to prise myself out of the door. Camera in hand I walked off towards the water that I have looked at daily from my window but not ventured out to. The area is know as Milton Common and is the site of what was once mudland and part known as Milton Lake. The area has been reclaimed and turned into grassland. There are three large freshwater lakes called Swan Lake, Duck Lake and Frog Lake.

When I got to the Swan Lake there was someone throwing quantities of bread into the water, which isnt ideal for any of the creatures living there but most of what was thrown in was quickly snapped up by the gulls. Once the gulls had had their fill it turned peaceful again and I took one of my first shots of the day.















A little further along I passed another photographer, we gave each other an agreeable nod as we did so. A few minutes later we found ourselves in the same spot together taking pictures that can be only described as 'one of those moments'. I think I took over 100 shots of this pair of swans with their 6, 2 day old chicks.















At one point while photographing the swans I met with some other smaller creatures. As I had knelt down I balanced myself by placing my hand down onto the grass. Good idea in theory but the nest of brown ants didnt see it that way. Three bites of the most painful sort were shared by them and it was three hours before the pain subsided.

Taking the walk a litttle further on I came to an open end to the lake. I walked up to the waters edge and stood looking. Then there right in front of me at almost arms length....




















One, two, three and then 4 Coot chicks. Mum was close by and it turned out there were 6 in total, two hiding in some long grass.

Sedge Warblers flitting about. Great tits, Greenfinches, Moorhens are just some of the other birds I got to see and hear.

There were wild flowers waiting for my keen eye to spot and capture...

Then it was time to return home.

I had a good day and the first real good day since moving to my new home. I saw lots of things I like, took a zillion or so photo's which I like doing. I got some fresh air, some sunlight into my eyes. A overall sense of wellbeing.

Today WAS a good day.

Spaghetti With a Chance of Meatballs!

The days seem to be flying by and all I seem to be doing is work. My days off are wasted and I know that its all my fault in part. I seem to have had a mad fill of hospital appointments this week too and have had to shuffle my days around to fit things in.

Im finding myself struggling to do things or go places again. I think mainly because I am worrying about the cost of things. I barely have two pennies to rub together and for the first time in my life I am in debt. She still has not come up with the money she owes me and so I will be in debt until she comes good with her promises. Im still holding my breath for the moment. It might appear, albeit late in the day.

I went online last night and did a sensible at Tesco's again for basic groceries. The fridge, freezer and cupboards are all well stocked and will sustain me for a few more weeks. I also needed a haircut badly and seemed to keep putting having it done off. I walked past a hairdressers this afternoon and after walking by, I doubled back on myself and went in. And you know what, I had a great conversation with the lady who did my hair and it was so refreshing to be able to talk about stuff in general. We spoke about the FA Cup Final being held tomorrow and how it was going to affect trade locally for a few hours. We spoke about Iron Man, who I have no idea about but one young member of her family loves to run about madly in his Iron Man costume and everytime he does the sun shines. Idle gossip, god how I miss simple converastion. That lady might not realise it but as she cut my hair it was more than just a hair cut... it was like therapy. I walked out of that shop smiling.

Tonight I have the fun of setting myself up for a sleep study. I collected the equipment from the hospital today and was given a brief run down on how to wire myself up. Oh I can see problems coming up. The thing is basically a unit the is strapped to be waist and then wired and tubes conected to my ribs and chest. THen there is a small unit that goes over my middle finger of my left hand which I think monitors the oxygen levels in my blood. Another tube hooks up to my face mask which I have to use when I go to sleep, which is in turn attached to the cpap maching. This forces air into me keeping my airway open. Oh the joys of sleep Apnoea (did I spell that right???). Tonight I am going to resemble a pile of spaghetti... if there are steaming meatballs on top then I wired myself up wrong!!!!!
The reason for this study is that although I have been using the cpap machine for quite some time now, I am still having a lot of trouble staying awake during the day. The machine should have made some major difference but its apparent that its not having the effect it should be. So this is just basically being set up to see what is going on while I am apparently sleeping. Hopefully there will be some answers.

On top of all that I had another appointment at the hospital today too. This was at the hearing clinic. I have had a hearing aid for some months now but they would only put one in my 'good' ear. I didnt even know I had hearing loss in that ear until quite recently when they set me up for the aid. The ear that I am really quite deaf in has caused me a lot of problems over the year and which rsulted in my having a major operation on it in 2002. Regular visits to the hospital have been ongoing since then. Today the specialist made the decision to give the go ahead for a hearing aid in my deaf ear. Who would have thought it eh. They really did have reasons for concern putting a hearing aid into me 'deaf' ear, but it is going to be so interesting to see if this makes the difference I have been in need of for such a long time.

So its time to go wire myself up... until the next post.

Blossoming

Things are becoming normal in my life, if that is the correct way to describe it.
I still have my 'feeling down' moments, there are no highs and I'm not really expecting any. No, that's a actually a lie. I had a visit from my cousin who I have not seen in years. Probably about January 2002 if memory serves me right. It wasn't a long stay but she drove down and I cooked what turned out to be a lovely veggie roast dinner with apple pie and custard for pudding. Amazing what you can do with frozen foods. My cousin didn't complain either and she polished off her plate quite quickly. We just chatted about things regarding our families past and present. Remembering our grandparents and talking plenty about, as I have previously described... our dysfunctional families of the present. That was on Sunday and probably the first real conversation face to face I have had since I was in London which must be at least 6 weeks ago now. I'm not afraid to admit I feel quite lonely. I mean, as bad the experiences I have had over the past few years were, there was at least someone in my life and conversations to be had. Now I go to work and come home. There are no conversations as such. Hello's and 'Do you work here?' by customers is as much as I can hope for. I come home to the cat and get a lot of noise which interprets loosely as, 'Where the fudge have you been for the last 10 hours, don't you know I need feeding?'. I have Friday off this week so I plan to go out on Thursday evening to The Barn which is local to me. They hold an Open Mic night there every Thursday which I have been to plenty of times before. I feel like going along just to get me out of the flat. But not just for that reason. Actually because I feel like I want to go. I know a few faces there and there is generally some good music to be heard. I hope I manage to switch off the getting out the door phobia. I will let you know how it goes.

I don't know if I have mentioned it previously but I came home the other day and the flowering Cherry Tree outside my window had burst open its flower buds in one gigantic blossom explosion.
The deep blue sky against the pink hues of the blossom looked fantastic and it brought a smile to my face as the sunlight filtered through the opaque petals.
I love nature at its best and in its natural glory. I think it is great to see things happen like that. I call it natures art, because that to me is what it is. I have added a photo I took so you can share some of my enjoyment.

Which brings me to something else. I have always had a passion for all things art. Drawing, painting, design, photography and of course, nature. All of those categories fit well with each other. Well in my book they do anyway and I think that that is where I am going to head. Like some people who play a musical instrument, they take great pride in what they do and achieve, but always striving for a little more, something new, something different. I have always been told I am good at art and photography. Ever since I was a young child I was always pointed out at school as 'the boy who can draw'. I know people like my photography, because I am told so by folks who see my photos.
Today, I had a nice message from a dear friend whom I have never met but have known for a long time via the Internet. She said that if I ever start to publish my artwork on a website or blog, make sure I let her know. That is what I am going to do. I will keep this blog ongoing as a reminder of my daily-ish thoughts, but open up some new pages in the form of a gallery to show some of my work. This in turn will be the incentive to get me out in my spare time to take photos of the things around me locally, and maybe sit and sketch, something I have not done for a very long time.

So there it is, I have an action plan in the making. I didn't see it coming but its just slapped me right across the face shouting wakey wakey.

Waking is something I will be doing in about 6 hours from now so until the next post...